stop reproducing violence
by: kiara, art host
"when we attempt to love out of woundedness, then our loving is only violence." -Lama Rod Owens
i no longer want to commit violence by wounding people with my words, my anger, my rage. all this built up trauma has had me swinging at air. [i. am. exhausted.]
the more space we make for our pain, is space we've allowed to kick love out. we have to stop believing that our suffering is inevitable, especially when comparing it to the world suffering we see daily on social media. this state of thinking has forced us to believe we are capable of living with trauma because what's our pain compared to the children locked up in cages that were taken away from their families? what's our pain compared to yet another black child killed by the police's irrational fear triggered response? our pain is no big deal compared to that type of suffering, right?
how do you compartmentalize your trauma now that you've made room for more pain? not only have we avoided our trauma, we've now made room for everybody else's pain. [does it ever get too cramped in there for you or is that just me?]
see, i understand all the back to back questions can be overwhelming, but theres no way self-love will exist, if we don't make room for healing. trauma is selfish and makes no room for healing and it's time for you to be selfish too.
"our hurt is our deep identification with a self that can and is experiencing pain. when we are identifying like this, then our actions are more about protecting ourselves than generating authentic concern for others. we see the world around us as antagonistic. everything becomes a threat. because of this perceived threat, we often find ourselves in a heightened state of responsiveness, always reacting and attacking. in this way, we are protecting ourselves against others and further acting out of a frustration of never feeling comfortable. our acting perpetuates suffering for others and thus violence is reproduced."
-Radical Dharma, Lama Rod Owens
is that what we have been doing, antagonizing the world around us because our suffering is too scared to face itself?
how much longer will we continue to reproduce violence onto others? how much longer will we hurt ourselves and neglect to take care of the wounds?
let's make some room for wound healing and dig deep into our unconscious, because its time to face the trauma we forced ourselves to forget. how you do that is up to you.
lately, i've been wound healing by sitting in silence before my children wake up in the morning. reading about mindfulness, completing writing activities centered around my mindfulness journey and spending a ton of time with family feels right for me at the moment. i'm celebrating the small wins and reminding myself that i'm farther away from zero. [i still haven't given up pizza, which i should because it's so mean to me. acid reflux mixed with lactose intolerance is not a good mix.]
with all thats going on in the world, it becomes easy to neglect your trauma. but, the world will always need something and neglecting yourself often, sounds like a tragedy waiting to happen. healing isn't impossible, it just takes you showing up and giving it all you got in your current condition. sometimes, healing is avoiding negative self talk for 5 minutes, and i can only hope that with practice, you'll add 5 more minutes to that freedom daily.
take off your mask challenge: what part of your trauma can you address today? how do you treat your trauma? are you kind to it or cause it more pain? and, how can you stop reproducing violence?
#healyourparts & feel free to comment with your answers below. please make time today for your hurt, because you deserve to let go.